#1 | 30.10.2005Episode 1 (Beast in Show)
Farm animals at a county show talk about taking part in the contests, checking out the competition, and breeding perfection. A pig stresses the importance of having a pedigree, a duck explains why a pond is essential for keeping waterfowl, and chickens discuss the politics of egg judging. This episode introduces Two recurring characters Bill the Hare and Black the Pig.
#2 | 06.11.2005Episode 2 (The Brood)
Various animals talk about their families, whether it be children, siblings or parents, and they discuss the bonds and relationships they have with their relatives. This episode introduced regular characters Brain and Keith the Staffordshire Bull Terriers, Derek the Sharpei, Victor the Geordie Mouse and Muriel and Catherine the Bats.
#3 | 13.11.2005Episode 3 (Pet Hates)
The animals reveal what annoys them. A spider on a car's rear view mirror complains about reckless drivers, Behzad the police horse explains the best way to deal with rowdy drunks, and Clement tries to explain what a "pet hate" is while being constantly interrupted by the sound of a jackhammer. This episode introduces regular characters Behzad the horse and Nicola and Steve the pigs.
#4 | 20.11.2005Episode 4 (Impressions)
How does a hamster sound like a kipper? Does an owl give a hoot? Can a slug imitate a chicken? Animals test their vocal prowess.
#5 | 27.11.2005Episode 5 (Animals in the 'Hood)
The Animals talk about what they like (and dislike) about their homes and the areas they live in. An alligator praises her home in the sewer, an ant talks through his method of brick-laying, limpets talk about their rock on the shore and Clement the Bloodhound takes pride in the structural quality of his kennel.
#6 | 04.12.2005Episode 6 (Sport!)
The Animals discuss fitness, their favourite sports and why they play them. A polar bear talks about the joys of fishing, dung beetles play a game of football with a ball of dung, a pair of scorpions practice duelling with their claws, and Trixie and Captain Cuddlepuss argue about whether darts should be classed as a sport or not. This episode is dedicated to the memory of the late Frank Philips, the voice of Frank the Tortoise.
#7 | 11.12.2005Episode 7 (Monarchy Business)
The animals discuss the British Royal Family, what they actually do, and whether or not Britain really needs them. Among the interviewees supporting the Royals are the Queen's corgis and the Tower of London's ravens, as well as some foreign tourists visiting Buckingham Palace, including an American Grizzly bear, a Kenyan wildebeest, an Indian elephant, and a family of Chinese pandas.
#8 | 18.12.2005Episode 8 (Animal Magnetism)
The animals talk about their love lives, relationships, and what they look for in potential mates. Nancy reveals what first attracted her to Sid, Behzad explains the importance of body odor in finding the perfect match, and Pickles describes the feeling of being in love, all of the while oblivious to her owner falling into a sewer.
#9 | 25.12.2005Episode 9 (Merry Christmas Everybody!)
Christmas time has come again, and the recurring characters all have a go at singing the classic Christmas carol 'Twelve Days of Christmas'. This special episode was longer than the other episodes of the series, at 22 minutes instead of the usual 10.
#10 | 08.01.2006Episode 10 (Bed Time)
The animals discuss their sleep patterns. A cat explains the problems of sleeping for night shift workers, a tortoise struggles to stay awake while lamenting about having to go to sleep, a woodlouse complains about his wife's snoring, and Spanner and Trousers list some of the strange places where they have slept, including in fields and under motorway bridges.
#11 | 15.01.2006Episode 11 (Self Image)
The animals discuss their appearances, dieting, body confidence, and the ethics of cosmetic surgery. Catherine the bat contemplates getting a nose job, a seal expresses her disgust at liposuction, a snake explains how a person's "inner sense" stops them eating certain things, and a cluster of mussels debate which of them is the best looking.
#12 | 22.01.2006Episode 12 (Communication)
The animals talk about languages, accents, dialects, and how they communicate with others. A sheep mimics a shepherd's whistle to demonstrate his flock's reaction, a dog explains how to tell when a donkey is angry, Victor points out the strange use of words in the Geordie accent, and Mazulu and Toto contemplate how language has evolved through history.
#13 | 29.01.2006Episode 13 (Safari Park)
Animals in a safari park (some of whom are voiced by the staff of Longleat Safari Park) discuss life in captivity and their opinions on the other animals they share their home with. A giraffe from South Africa hopes to get a work permit so he can stay at the park, an ostrich describes her daily routine, and a deer talks about the laziness of the park's hippos and his affection for a zebra named Katie. The owner of Longleat, Alexander Thynn, 7th Marquess of Bath, features in this episode as the voice of a lion.
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